PHD's Independence: a positive or a challenge to manage?

Nicola shares PHD student' experiences - the freedom, the challenges and calls for post graduate research students to share their experiences.

- Dr. Nicola Byrom

As part of an Office for Students / Research England funded project with Derby University I�ve had the opportunity to interview PhD students about their experience. It seems a time packed full of challenging balances to navigate. Many students point to the freedom that they have as one of the best parts of being a PhD student; you have the opportunity to create your own profile, to manage your own time, to follow your own interests and motivations.

As with any long project, there are peaks and troughs. At the peaks the independence is exhilarating. In the troughs, the independence can feel overwhelming.  With independence comes a real sense that �this is on me;� that if you don�t work out how to make the experiment work, or how to get a project running, no one else will.

Students have talked to me about the challenges they face around training. Even when working in a large and supportive lab group, it can be hard to find someone to help when you get stuck. It feels like this is because, as everyone specialises, there may genuinely be no one within the group who really understands what you are doing and why you are stuck. Reflecting on this experience, students see the positives; these experiences teach you to have self-confidence � you can, eventually, solve problems on your own. If grit wasn�t a pre-requisite for a PhD, it seems to be something most students feel they�ve developed.

When you are independent, you are also responsible. When things are going well, this can feel great. When problems arise, experiments don�t work, or your line of inquiry hits a dead end, it can feel awful. At these points, it can be difficult to separate personal responsibility for errors (the self-doubt can be quick to creep in) from the reality of research; failure is common. After nearly a decade working in research, I�ve learnt that the only certainty seems to be that most things fail! Failure is part of the process, it is something that we can learn from, but that reality doesn�t make it much easier to bear your first failures.

The feeling of independence, and the positives that accompany this, was not universal. Two situations seem liable to curtail independence. First, where a student has transitioned from working as a research assistant in a laboratory group to completing his/her PhD in this group, there can be challenges making the transition to independence. It can be difficult to let go of previous projects and papers to find time to carve out for your own work. Second, where students have industry funded PhDs and spend some of their time in industry, there may be conflicting ideas about the purpose of a PhD, with industry partners expecting to have more influence over the focus of the research and even the day-to-day activities.

Finally, most PhD students that we�ve spoken to so far identify that there is a limit to this independence; their studies are, after all, directed by their supervisor. Interestingly, students in their later years of study have been describing a process of learning to manage their supervisor; there is a process to work through from looking to the supervisor for direction to truly feeling you own the project.

As a PhD student, do you have independence? Is this a positive thing? Or can it be a challenge? Share your experience and help us better understand how to support PhD students here.

I am Dr Nicola Byrom a Lecturer in Psychology at Kings� College London and Founder of Student Minds. 

How To Make The Best Of Time Out

Eloise shares her tips on how to make the best of time out from university due to your mental health. 

- Eloise Stark

Bad times have a scientific value. These are occasions a good learner would not miss.

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Taking time out from university is a growing occurrence, and is often due to mental health difficulties. At Oxford, the process of taking time out has the intimidating verb �rusticating�, derived from the Latin word rus, which means countryside. This is because students were often sent back to their family in the country. 

Taking time out may be compulsory or voluntary, but despite the reasons for why you need to put a pause on university, there are ways to make sure that your time is well spent.

Recovery

If you have taken time out due to mental health problems, the first priority will be to work towards recovery. This may take different forms depending on your mental health condition and level of functioning, but could include time spent in hospital, outpatient treatment, trips to your GP, trials of medication, or various types of therapy. Trust in the people who are here to help you and be honest and open at appointments. If you don�t feel you are getting the right support, try finding an advocate or writing a letter to explain what you think you need. Don�t give up. The NHS is horribly stretched but that doesn�t mean you have to settle for sub-optimum care. 

My experience has been that you will get a degree of help from others, but you also need to learn to help yourself. There is no magic bullet and no one is going to swoop in and save you. But equally, you know yourself best. You are the person who can best learn about your triggers, your unhelpful cognitions, what makes you tick and what your ultimate goals are. 

It is important to be realistic about your recovery � it might not happen overnight and you might not be �recovered� when you return to university in a year or two. Indeed, some conditions may be lifelong. What you should aim for is improvement and understanding of how to make life easier. Aim for progress, not perfection, and remember that you can improve your situation, however dire it may feel. 

Making your time meaningful 

I found during my time out that at first I felt very low because I didn�t feel as if I had any purpose while I wasn�t a student any more. I had nothing to do with my time, and so I felt useless and lazy. I would have liked to find a part-time job but I was not well enough. So I mobilised myself to find things to do that make me feel purposeful and like my life was meaningful. 

I found several volunteering opportunities for a couple of hours at a time. For instance, I did some admin for the charity Oxford Hub every Wednesday afternoon and I volunteered at my local village library. I also tried some things that didn�t work out, and that�s okay too. I signed up to volunteer in an Oxfam bookshop, and was left alone on the till after a 30-minute induction. I was so terrified and anxious of getting the till wrong, that I gave my thanks but never returned.

Can you join a local sports team? Do you enjoy going to the gym? Is there a reading group you could join? How about a couple of hours helping in a retirement home, or a charity shop? Is there a local Scouts group you could volunteer with? There are tonnes of opportunities if you look hard enough! 

Goals

Keeping an eye on the future is an important thing to do. Make goals, even if they are as silly as seeing the S Club 7 reunion band live in concert. What do you want to do as a career? Would you like a family? Would you like to continue to do a PhD? On a shorter timescale, goals could be things like making it to see a friend once a week (social contact is very important during your time out too), or reading a novel every month. Be kind to yourself, don�t set anything too difficult for yourself, but keep the future in mind. 

Never give up

I know what it is like when it feels as if you�ll never get back to university. When you see your friend�s photos on Facebook or Instagram and they look like they�re having a great time, and you feel sad that it�s not you. But time out can be a wonderful, healing time if you make the most from it. 

You just do it. You force yourself to get up. You force yourself to put one foot before the other, and God damn it, you refuse to let it get to you. You fight. You cry. You curse. Then you go about the business of living. That�s how I�ve done it. There�s no other way.

- Elizabeth Taylor

Hi, my name is Eloise and I am a second year PhD student at Oxford University, studying at the intersection between Neuroscience and Psychiatry. I am passionate about mental health, reducing stigma and increasing empathy for people experiencing distress.

Impostor Syndrome and Me

Will shares his experiences and the things that he does to deal with negative thoughts during his PhD.

- Will

�You�re no good at this.� �If everyone knew how awful you were, they would all hate you.� �What if I don�t know anything? What if everyone finds out?� � just a few of the things that my raging impostor syndrome has repeatedly dictated to my consciousness during my PhD. Today I�m going to share my experiences and things I do to deal with these kinds of negative thoughts.

For a long time it didn�t even have a name. I only became aware of the phrase towards the end of the first year of my PhD. A quick Google search brings up �impostor syndrome PhD� as the second suggestion. Second! I don't know why it happens to me, and I don't know if I actually have it worse than others, or whether it's just that I'm prepared to talk about it more. But having a problem isn't important, it is how you deal with it that matters:

So what do I do?

1. �You don�t know anything� - Write everything down and take stock

I don�t have much experience with swords, but apparently a pen is mightier than one. A few months ago, I decided to write down everything I knew about my project in an effort to combat my impostor syndrome. I realised that I knew perhaps more than I thought I did after about 10 sides of A4.

Without sounding horribly self-absorbed, I also find that it helps to write down all the things I've done that would make me 'successful': conference prizes won, solving problems that had been on me for months, making discoveries, raising mental health awareness, and so on. Downplaying your own successes is part of this syndrome, so switch off your filter for 10 minutes and just write about how great you are!

2. �You�re no good at this� - Be kind to yourself

I think one of the things I struggled with most with moving to postgraduate from undergraduate studies was the complete lack of structure. Assessments are common during undergraduate, so it's easier to track progress and to benchmark how much work you're doing. Doing a PhD, it's rare that you'll be told that you're doing enough, and there's almost no assessments. It's very easy to fall in to the mindset of "I'm not doing enough, I'm not good enough". In addition, perfectionism and impossibly high standards are common among us impostors. When we don't or can't reach our own standards, this compounds the "you're no good at this" problem � a damaging circle of negative thoughts and feeling low.

This is a lot easier said than done, but you need to be kind to yourself. Comparing yourself to other students is a toxic mentality that will only make you feel far worse � it is also completely irrelevant because everyone is doing different things. Everyone � and I mean everyone � makes mistakes during their PhD. Of all of the things I've done during mine, it's the times when I haven't met my own standards through making a mistake that I've really learned something. What is a PhD if not an opportunity to learn new things?

3. �What if everyone finds out you�re a fraud?� � Talk

I�ve said it before, I�ll say it again: As a PhD student, I work alongside people who are either going through the same process � or have done very recently. These are the best people to talk to! If the statistics are correct, then between 5 and 6 of my 8 colleagues also have impostor syndrome. Just have an honest, open and unfiltered conversation about what's going on � though I understand that this isn't easy! Even if they can't help you, just to know that you're not on your own in feeling like this may well make you feel a bit better.

Conclusion

My experience so far suggests that this will probably be a never-ending battle, but I still believe that I will win in the end. Just like with a PhD, it's probably going to be a series of little victories that culminate in the end product. So here's my summary on what helps me to combat my impostor syndrome:

� Write down everything you know.

� Write down all of your successes or good things in your life � no matter how big or small.

� Write a plan for your thesis � you'll realise there's more there than you think.

� Talk to your friends, colleagues and supervisors about how you're feeling.

� Don't be so hard on yourself � you are human! Let the mistakes happen � they're what you really learn from.

� Know that you�re not alone in what you�re feeling.

I'm Will and I'm a final year PhD student. I've been dealing with anxiety since I was 14, and depression since I was 23. I found that writing and talking about my own experiences of mental health as a postgraduate student were hugely helpful to my recovery (and stress levels). I'm now working on improving student wellbeing at all levels and raising awareness of mental health.

Facing Fears: Taking on Mental Health as a Postgraduate

So, you�ve started your PhD without any issues with your mental health. But what happens if, like me, your mental health starts to suffer during your PhD? I�m going to offer some points of advice based on my own experiences of dealing with anxiety and depression during my PhD.

-Will

1. find your �person�
As a PhD student, I�m surrounded by academics, research associates and other PhD students who all know what it is like to have done (or be doing) a PhD. Among these people is my �person� � someone who I could trust with anything, and who I could tell anything to.

In short, there is no way I could have made it through my mental health problems without my person. I�m extremely fortunate to have him as a mentor, friend, brother. He always listens to me, gives out hugs, and is generally brilliant at getting me back on track when I have a wobble. Find your person and tell them what�s happening.

2. talk
When my mental health problems were starting to affect my work, I knew that I needed to tell my supervisor what was going on. I worked myself up and worried about the conversation I was going to have for days. I was stressed about being stressed, but I knew I needed to have the talk.

Talking is easy but trying to articulate what you�re feeling can be really difficult � it was for me! It was difficult � I won�t deny it � but I felt so much better knowing that what I was thinking and feeling was no longer confined to my own head. My supervisor was wonderfully supportive and sympathetic, and the conversation was everything I hoped it would be. It was also the first step to getting the support I needed. They want to see you do well and be happy in what you�re doing.

3. get to know what works for you
Everyone has their own way of dealing with their mental health. Maybe it�s mindfulness, exercise, meditation, counselling, socialising and recreation � there are loads of things that work for different people to help them relax, de-stress, and improve their moods.

After trying loads of things to help my mental health, my go-to thing now is to find a caf� somewhere (anywhere) and read a book by one of my favourite authors. I also find that going for a run after work helps too. The important thing is to find what works for you � this might take some time, but, just like with a PhD, it is important not to give up.

4. know that you aren�t on your own
I�m not sure what percentage of the Earth�s population are currently studying at a postgraduate level, but everyone has led different lives, and had different experiences. However different we might feel though, know that you are not on your own. You aren�t the first person whose mental health has been affected during a PhD (there are loads of papers on it too) and in all likelihood you aren�t the only person to have gone through the things that have happened to you.

I thought for a long time that I was on my own with how I was feeling. It was only when a friend (and fellow PhD student) told me about what was happening to them that I realised � I wasn�t. When I looked into this a bit more, I found that there were loads of students like me whose mental health issues had first cropped up during their PhD. I wasn�t alone, and neither are you.

5. take time away
If you feel like you need to get away from your studies to deal with your mental health, that is absolutely fine. Your university should have a way that you can take �leave of absence� where you can take extended time away without affecting the time on your PhD. Use this if you think it might be helpful for you!

It�s also important to take guilt-free time for yourself every day: take holidays, have lunch away from your desk, have 15 minutes in the afternoon for a cup of tea and to read a book, leave early one day. Just make sure you look after yourself!

to finish�
�Help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who ask for it� said Professor Dumbledore. I am pleased to say that this phrase extends to us Muggles too. Help and support are always there in a variety of forms, but it can only be given if people know that it is required.

Identifying a problem is the easy part, doing something about it is the hard part. It usually all starts with a conversation.



I'm Will and I'm a final year PhD student. I've been dealing with anxiety since I was 14, and depression since I was 23. I found that writing and talking about my own experiences of mental health as a postgraduate student were hugely helpful to my recovery (and stress levels). I'm now working on improving student wellbeing at all levels and raising awareness of mental health.

Tips for Chinese Students coming to UK

This blog is written by a Chinese student who would like to share their experience with other Chinese students about coming to the UK to study.

-Ethan

In recent years, the number of Chinese students coming to the UK for Masters study has increased dramatically. I, as a Chinese student have been studying at the University of Edinburgh for 4 years, want to share my experiences with the incoming Chinese students regarding keeping your mental health in good condition while studying in the UK.

A year abroad is an experience that seems to end as quickly as it started. But for this whole year, you will be away from your family and friends, which may be tough. Therefore, it is important that you understand the social situation and living atmosphere while you are choosing the university, so you can come to the UK physically and mentally prepared.

Here are some tips which might be useful for keeping your mental health in good condition while studying in the UK:

1. Choose accommodation wisely

The first thing to think about before you come to the UK is to find an appropriate accommodation for yourself. Most universities in the UK provide accommodation for the first year Masters students and as far as I am concerned, it is the best choice for most of the students, especially for the Chinese students who are studying abroad for the first time.

If you do plan to rent a flat outside of the university, make sure you go through the process from credible authority. It is always recommended to live with one or two flatmates as you can help each other out in your life abroad.

2. Understand the living skill

The education system in UK universities are quite different from the Chinese ones. In the UK, you need to learn the skill of studying as well as taking care of yourself in your daily life. So, it is important that you learn some basic living skills before you come to study here, such as cooking.
A good study and living habit will also help you keep your mental health in good condition.


3. Find a good balance for your study life

It is always important to work hard during your time here, but it is also important to keep yourself away from feeling too much pressure from your studying. Although it is very normal to get stressed over exams or deadlines, it's not good to let the study pressure take over your life. Your mental health is much more important than getting a good grade. Therefore, you need to focus on getting yourself well, happy, and in the right emotional state to continue working while studying abroad.


4. Always look for help

It can be very easy to get stressed due to work or study while you�re abroad, and as a result you may feel very lonely. It is always better if you can to try and talk to someone else, such as your friends or family members when you are feeling in bad mood.
You can even visit the mental health website or call the night line for a bit of support too. You are definitely not alone, and I am sure there are so many people that are very willing to help you out.



Hi, I'm Ethan. I'm currently a PhD student study engineering in University of Edinburgh and wanted to share some my own experience and give some tips to Chinese student who are coming to study in UK regarding how to keep mental health in good condition when they study abroad.

Looking after your mental health during your PhD

Eloise explores the struggles that accompany postgraduate studies, sharing her ways to look after yourself and your mental well-being whilst making the most of your degree.

- Eloise Stark

Studying for a PhD is seen as the pinnacle of education. Over three or four years you become the world�s leading expert in your particular �niche�. Yes, not many people might be interested in knowing which can jump higher: the dog flea or the cat flea, whether woodpeckers get headaches, or the cultural significance of Lady Gaga. But if they ever need an expert on Women�s Hour, you would be their number one choice.

This academic prowess does not come without its costs, however. According to research, 32% of PhD students are at risk of having or developing a psychiatric disorder such as depression. This may even be a conservative estimate, as a 2014 UC Berkeley report found that 43-46% of graduate students in the biosciences reported that they were depressed. Doctoral students face considerable stress, whether internally or externally generated, and this can lead to depression, eating disorders, chronic insomnia, and even suicidal thoughts.

My own experience of graduate study corroborates this. Being hugely ambitious, I pushed myself to breaking point, and subsequently had to take a two-year break to focus on my mental health and wellbeing. I learnt the hard way, but by sharing my experience, I hope that you will not become one of those statistics.

Isolation

Given that you will probably be studying something so niche that it takes you half an hour to explain it properly at dinner parties, it is easy to feel isolated. The start of a PhD often involves a comprehensive literature search, culminating in a flawless understanding of your area and any preceding research. This can be a lonely pursuit, reading dozens of articles a day and making meticulous notes.

I am lucky to be studying a scientific subject, so my research group has our own office, that we endearingly call �the lab.� On weekdays, we can treat our studies like a job, turning up from 9 to 5 and furnishing our desks with motivational postcards and our most trusty academic tomes. My humanities friends, however, do not often get dedicated desk space and the support of a group. Libraries tend to become their main working environment, which can quickly become oppressive when spending your day sitting in silence surrounded by strangers.

My advice would therefore be to try and create a community � ask people on your course or from your department if they want to work together in the library, take shared lunch breaks and coffee runs. There are even workspaces which you can hire to simulate an office environment. Try to socialise at least once per day so that you don�t spend your whole day in silence. There are bound to be lots of people just like you who crave company and solidarity. Scientists: make use of your academic community, suggest joint lunch breaks, a daily midday walk, or Friday evening drinks.

Supervision

The key to a happy PhD is a good supervisor. To some extent you are taking a risk when you sign up to do your doctorate with a certain academic, so it makes sense to scope them out beforehand, and if possible contact existing PhD students under their supervision for their opinions. Having co-supervisors has been really helpful for me, as they offer different perspectives (one is a Neuroscientist, the other a Psychiatrist).

Supervisors often have many, many plates spinning at one time, so it can be difficult to regularly secure their attention. Try to make an agreement about how often you will meet, and set interim goals between meetings. Be accountable for your own progress, and be assertive if you�re not getting what you need. Supervisors are often exceptional academics, but they are not mind readers. Tell them what you need � they will be grateful.

�Publish or Perish�

The maxim �publish or perish� is a mainstay of academic pressures. During your PhD, but usually more towards the end, you will be under pressure to produce papers that demonstrate your academic prowess. Academia is a bit like a funnel � the higher you get the more competitive it is and the fewer the opportunities. If you choose to stay in academia and pursue a sought-after postdoctoral position, your publications will undoubtedly count towards your job prospects. If you take this into account early enough, you can forward plan to prepare chapters for your thesis, but also mould them into publishable contributions to a journal. However, keep in mind that quality always trumps quantity. Rejections are common, so don�t take it to heart. Do your best � no one can be perfect and I like to think that we naturally find our own way in the end.

Public engagement is a growing element of all careers in research, so getting involved with local initiatives is a really good idea (we have a public event called �Brain Week� in Oxford including talks, hands-on stands, and museum exhibitions). You can also write for student newspapers or magazines, or for The Conversation, perhaps distilling your own work in a public-oriented catchy way, or summarising recent research in your field. This sort of activity can do a lot for your �reputation� as a good researcher, and should hopefully be enjoyable too.

Strategies for staying well

Before my break from study, I was a perfectionist who demanded top-quality work on all occasions. Since taking time out, I have adjusted my expectations considerably, and implemented several strategies to stay happy but also be productive.

Goal setting is incredibly important. For me, a timeline is helpful � giving each experimental chapter I need for my thesis dedicated time for prior research, data collection, data analysis, and the manuscript write-up. Seeing the whole time you have to finish your PhD spread out, with manageable targets for each sub-project, can reassure you that you�re on track.

I also deviate slightly from my chosen research topic every now and then, to keep my interest piqued in adjoining fields. For instance, my PhD involves the neuroscience of face perception in parent-infant interaction, but I have just published a book chapter on music and wellbeing. I also keep abreast of the recent research in a number of fields that are not directly related to my PhD, by setting up Google Scholar alerts (if you don�t know what this is � it sets up regular emails with the most recent papers published for specific keywords that you input). Lastly, I try to attend a couple of lectures every week on topics that are new to me, or at least unrelated to my area. It is so refreshing to hear and can boost your academic enthusiasm considerably.

Having a support network is invaluable. This will be different for each person, but may include family, friends from home and uni, peer supporters, Junior Deans, your supervisor, your GP, or the local mental health team. Joining a society based on a common interest (I am a proud member of the Oxford Origami Society) can give you a great community of friends and opportunities to socialise. I have been a part of the rowing team since starting my undergraduate degree and have made lifelong friends who I can count on for a cup of tea if I need to vent.

And lastly, if things do go wrong or you are not happy, don�t panic. I have yet to meet a PhD student who has had a smooth ride. The most important thing is to not suffer in silence. Talk to everyone you can. Problem solve and explore options. A PhD is supposed to be challenging but it is not supposed to make you miserable.

�You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it.�

? Maya Angelou

Hi, my name is Eloise and I am a second year PhD student at Oxford University, studying at the intersection between Neuroscience and Psychiatry. I am passionate about mental health, reducing stigma and increasing empathy for people experiencing distress.

Graduation Nerves: What's Next?

Lucy shares her advice for 3rd year students going into their final semester of university, and fearing �what�s next?� once they graduate.

- Lucy

Rewind a few years ago, I never thought that the day would come where I would be finishing my undergraduate degree, let alone starting a Masters. The past few years have been a complete whirlwind, with every plan that I've made regarding my future, falling apart when something else comes up instead. 

Although I am the type of person who loves to plan and has some sort of idea what the future may hold, I've enjoyed the unexpectedness of how each year has played out for me. It has made me realise that sometimes it's better to take a step back from trying to control every aspect of your life and let fate take the lead. It has ended up allowing me to take up some of the most amazing opportunities and experiences of my life.

It can be incredibly daunting to be a 3rd year student going into the final semester. I remember feeling exactly like that last year when I wasn't sure what I wanted to do once I had finished university. I knew that I wasn't ready to leave it behind and I still had so much more to learn, but I still didn't have the faintest clue of what to do next.

It can be incredibly tempting to spend your final semester planning every aspect of your life for once you graduate, but this can be unhealthy. It can make your final few months pass so quickly without giving you chance to fully appreciate them. Although some degree of planning is needed, as you may have to send off applications or figure out what kind of career you want, you must not let it consume your final semester.

It doesn't matter if you don't have your whole life planned out. It doesn't matter if you don't know what kind of job you want or whether you want to extend your education for a little bit longer. Nobody expects you to come out of university and suddenly achieve every dream that you had originally set out to accomplish, so you shouldn't put that pressure on yourself either.

Finishing university can feel like you're finally stepping into the huge and scary adult world, where you suddenly need to grow up and get a lifetime career. Although a lot of people do jump into careers they have been working so hard for, this doesn't have to be the case for everyone.

Leaving university doesn't have to be a scary time: it can be exciting too! It's down to you to make it that way. 

There is no rule book that signifies that you have to leave university and immediately start working towards your long-term career goals. Instead it can be a chance to do everything you never had the chance to do before you headed off to university. Perhaps you always wanted to take a gap year and go travelling but had never had the confidence before. Now is your time to try it! Maybe you just want to get a short-term job and experience living in another city for a year. Now is your time to try it! Or maybe you want to further your education and get a Masters in the topics that interest you most. Now is, also, the time to try it!

Whatever it is that you really want to do, you should give yourself the chance to finally experience that, completely guilt-free. Graduating from university doesn't have to be the start of that mature adult life, where you feel like you need to suddenly grow up. Instead, it can be a continuation of how you've spent your past three years at university - a time to have some fun and find out who you are as a person.

Don't let the end of university be consumed with fear and pressures to suddenly pursue the career you've been working towards. Let it be a celebration of what you have achieved and take the next few years to do the things you've always wanted to do!

Hello! I'm Lucy, a Clinical Psychology Masters student at Anglia Ruskin University! Through studying Psychology and experiencing life as a student, I have become incredibly passionate about mental health and helping to make a positive change. I have been volunteering for Student Minds for the past 2 years as a Peer Support Facilitator at my university, and have been the Editor of the Student Minds blog since June 2017.